Monday, June 28, 2010
OBNOXIO THE CLOWN'S ABUSE COLUMNS
This is why some kids are afraid of clowns.
Cleverly abusive wit was Obnoxio's stock-in-trade. Sit and learn at the feet of the Master!
Friday, June 25, 2010
THE TRUTH ABOUT ELVIS ARON PRESLEY
THE TRUTH ABOUT ELVIS ARON PRESLEY is about Dr. Donald Hinton's supposed treatment of Elvis Presley - in modern times. Hinton is an MD, practicing here in Missouri. He specializes in Psychiatry. He probably needs to.
The photo of the gentleman on the riding lawnmower is purported to be Elvis as he looks today.
This story died pretty quick after it hit the news. Wonder if Dr. Hinton's career died as rapidly?
THE CONFESSION OF O.J. SIMPSON
O. J. cops to both Ron and Nicole’s murders – but only after he’s been acquitted in the murder trial. Fred Goldman proposes to drop his civil suit if O.J. confesses. O.J. takes the deal and that’s the premise of this fictional piece.
I imagine that O.J. now wishes a deal like that had been in place initially or else he might not have wound up in jail on kidnapping charges. He certainly wouldn’t have become the bitch on Cell Block H or wherever he’s housed these days.
GHOST OF DRAGSTRIP HOLLOW/GHOST IN THE INVISIBLE BIKINI
If a ghost was wearing an invisible bikini, wouldn’t she then be naked? One of the questions my young, warped, fragile mind was contemplating as I first saw THE GHOST IN THE INVISIBLE BIKINI in the early 1970s on local TV during their frequent beach movie marathons. And, if she was naked, could it please, Dear God, be Nancy Sinatra?
Still have a crush on Miss Sinatra to this day and at last got to see her lovely undraped form in the pages of PLAYBOY some years back, so at least that part of the fantasy was fulfilled.
Haven’t yet watched GHOST OF DRAGSTRIP HOLLOW, but who cares? I’m going to go back to thinking about Nancy in that invisible bikini…..
Still have a crush on Miss Sinatra to this day and at last got to see her lovely undraped form in the pages of PLAYBOY some years back, so at least that part of the fantasy was fulfilled.
Haven’t yet watched GHOST OF DRAGSTRIP HOLLOW, but who cares? I’m going to go back to thinking about Nancy in that invisible bikini…..
SANTA CLAUS
The K. Gordon Murray/Kiddie Matinee classic.
Gotta admit, I saw this one (yes, at a Kiddie Matinee) when I was about 12. Even then it was irritating.
A poor little girl struggles with her conscience as she is torn between shoplifting a doll she wants or doing the right thing. Santa’s watching her, but so is Pitch, one of Satan’s minions.
Pretty standard fare for annoying Mexican movies dubbed into English. But, hey, it made more money than most of us will ever see, so what the hell do I know?
Gotta admit, I saw this one (yes, at a Kiddie Matinee) when I was about 12. Even then it was irritating.
A poor little girl struggles with her conscience as she is torn between shoplifting a doll she wants or doing the right thing. Santa’s watching her, but so is Pitch, one of Satan’s minions.
Pretty standard fare for annoying Mexican movies dubbed into English. But, hey, it made more money than most of us will ever see, so what the hell do I know?
RED SKELTON’S FAVORITE GHOST STORIES
A childhood favorite of mine. Every year around Halloweentime the Weekly Reader (remember those?) would offer this one in their book order forms. That’s how I got my first copy. It disappeared in the mists of time, but I have since found a couple of them here and there.
Of particular note is Red’s intro and the poem, “Little Eefin’ Annie”. That one stayed with me, but I had to re-read the book many years later because I’d forgotten everything else.
Of particular note is Red’s intro and the poem, “Little Eefin’ Annie”. That one stayed with me, but I had to re-read the book many years later because I’d forgotten everything else.
CORPSE GRINDERS 2
Can’t imagine that a sequel to THE CORPSE GRINDERS was “long-awaited”, as it says on the DVD cover. If so, I wonder if those who were “awaiting” it thought that it was worth “awaiting” for?
One of the extras here is take after loving take of Liz Renay screaming as she is supposedly on her way through the grinder.
Delores Fuller, Ed Wood’s most famous starlet, has a cameo here.
The plot: blah, blah, blah – grave robbing – blah, blah, blah – corpse grinding – blah, blah, blah – hungry lil’ kitties – blah, blah, blah – this time hungry aliens as well – blah, blah, blah – a whole new way of looking at population control. And, oh yes, blah, blah, blah.
Above is an example of what the kitty food label looks like in the film.
One of the extras here is take after loving take of Liz Renay screaming as she is supposedly on her way through the grinder.
Delores Fuller, Ed Wood’s most famous starlet, has a cameo here.
The plot: blah, blah, blah – grave robbing – blah, blah, blah – corpse grinding – blah, blah, blah – hungry lil’ kitties – blah, blah, blah – this time hungry aliens as well – blah, blah, blah – a whole new way of looking at population control. And, oh yes, blah, blah, blah.
Above is an example of what the kitty food label looks like in the film.
BRUCE LEE AND KUNG-FU MANIA
Another one of those “specialty” tapes from Good Times Home Video. This one, however, did eventually make its way onto DVD.
Mostly movie trailers and highlighted fight scenes. Especially loved previews from THE FLYING GUILLOTINE. It lands on someone’s head, removes it and flies off. Know several politicians I’d like to see that happen to.
Mostly movie trailers and highlighted fight scenes. Especially loved previews from THE FLYING GUILLOTINE. It lands on someone’s head, removes it and flies off. Know several politicians I’d like to see that happen to.
2001 MANIACS
A re-making of Herschell Gordon Lewis’s 2000 MANIACS - but without the heartwarming ending of the original movie.
As with 2000 MANIACS, 2001 MANIACS can best be described as a gory version of BRIGADOON, sans the musical numbers.
All kinds of unpleasantness awaits some modern-day Yankee tourists when they stop in at Pleasant Valley. This town was once the site of a Civil War massacre and it appears that the dead aren’t satisfied to remain dead.
Dismemberment by horses, a fatal case of “acid reflux”, metal orthodontia and a rump roast for dinner (you’ll recognize to whom the rump belongs by the tattoos on it) are just some of the memorable scenes.
If you don’t hurl, you’ll probably laugh yourself silly.
As with 2000 MANIACS, 2001 MANIACS can best be described as a gory version of BRIGADOON, sans the musical numbers.
All kinds of unpleasantness awaits some modern-day Yankee tourists when they stop in at Pleasant Valley. This town was once the site of a Civil War massacre and it appears that the dead aren’t satisfied to remain dead.
Dismemberment by horses, a fatal case of “acid reflux”, metal orthodontia and a rump roast for dinner (you’ll recognize to whom the rump belongs by the tattoos on it) are just some of the memorable scenes.
If you don’t hurl, you’ll probably laugh yourself silly.
BORIS KARLOFF PRESENTS TALES OF THE FRIGHTENED
One of my favorite books as a kid – sort of a junior version of NIGHT GALLERY.
Most unforgettable story in here is SAY GOODNIGHT TO MR. SPORKO. As it turns out, Sporko is more than just a young boy’s tutor.
Written for 4th graders and above.
Most unforgettable story in here is SAY GOODNIGHT TO MR. SPORKO. As it turns out, Sporko is more than just a young boy’s tutor.
Written for 4th graders and above.
THE BEST OF TRIUMPH, THE INSULT COMIC DOG
I have to say that I’m a big fan of obnoxious, cigar-smoking animal rubber hand puppets, so this one was made to order.
Robert Smigel’s creation is one for the ages. Triumph’s at his best when he puts people in their place(s).
Especially had a good time seeing Triumph giving grief to costumed Star Wars fans.
Grab this one and watch it when the kids are tucked in for the night.
Robert Smigel’s creation is one for the ages. Triumph’s at his best when he puts people in their place(s).
Especially had a good time seeing Triumph giving grief to costumed Star Wars fans.
Grab this one and watch it when the kids are tucked in for the night.
THE MONSTER THAT CHALLENGED THE WORLD
Here’s a switch: the escargot is eating YOU!
One of the more memorable films I saw THE MONSTER THAT CHALLENGED THE WORLD many years ago on Saturday Night’s CREATURE FEATURE on St. Louis Channel KDNL.
Thank God that video/DVD gives these films new life today.
Has one scene in it that makes me jump every time even though I know it’s coming.
Fun stuff.
One of the more memorable films I saw THE MONSTER THAT CHALLENGED THE WORLD many years ago on Saturday Night’s CREATURE FEATURE on St. Louis Channel KDNL.
Thank God that video/DVD gives these films new life today.
Has one scene in it that makes me jump every time even though I know it’s coming.
Fun stuff.
KILLER TOMATOES STRIKE BACK
I guess that the biggest joke here, aside from the whole Killer Tomatoes concept, has to be the casting of Rick Rockwell as our star.
As you may remember, Rick Rockwell was the “Millionaire” in the ill-fated TV special WHO WANTS TO MARRY A MILLIONAIRE. He chose Darva Conger from the contestants and they were wed at the end of the show. It didn’t go well.
An annulment was granted and they went their separate ways. Rockwell continued in his comedy career and Darva, well, she milked it for what it was worth as well. A spread, so to speak, in PLAYBOY, some radio work and God knows what after that.
Anyway, Rockwell did this film before all that Darva stuff blew up in his face. Make of that what you will.
John Astin returns as Professor Gangreen, this time to make another attempt at world domination through his tomato buddies.
As it was pointed out to me a long time ago, it’s really hard to hate a movie when it’s intentionally made to be bad.
Worth having for the double novelty value of Rockwell and giant BLT sandwiches.
As you may remember, Rick Rockwell was the “Millionaire” in the ill-fated TV special WHO WANTS TO MARRY A MILLIONAIRE. He chose Darva Conger from the contestants and they were wed at the end of the show. It didn’t go well.
An annulment was granted and they went their separate ways. Rockwell continued in his comedy career and Darva, well, she milked it for what it was worth as well. A spread, so to speak, in PLAYBOY, some radio work and God knows what after that.
Anyway, Rockwell did this film before all that Darva stuff blew up in his face. Make of that what you will.
John Astin returns as Professor Gangreen, this time to make another attempt at world domination through his tomato buddies.
As it was pointed out to me a long time ago, it’s really hard to hate a movie when it’s intentionally made to be bad.
Worth having for the double novelty value of Rockwell and giant BLT sandwiches.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)